blah..idk how i was happy last night..cuz now..pshh..w/e!! i jus finished cleaning the damn living room..watch..tomorrow it'll be dirty again. damn it...and i bet no1 even notices..who gives..damn it i dont. my fone's getting taken away, damn school! may freakin wants me to promise her to never get c's or she'll take away my fone. and i can promise her that b/c i know im going t at least once ok?! gosh, so i said i'll promise to try my best and she said 'not good enough' damn it im not gonna do a promise i can't keep b/c that just makes me not trust-worthy. so whatever, she's taking my fone...ugh..she doesnt understand! im so stupid ok?! so whatever...now im fone-less..i'll just become another boring person who never talks to anyone again...watch.  idk if we're goin to see a movie right now. whatever..i dont want to see dodgeball i wanna see catwoman but what if it gets sold out..damn..whatever...venting..bye..--kristin

i hate it! hate it! hate it!! its worse now!! gah i feel so selfish and self-centered...fine..ok!...fine!!! i promise to get no C's!!!!! or anything lower!!! i will try my best!!!! i dont my big sister to die!! we didnt go to the movies, i didnt even go in the car because may was smoking and i didnt wanna go in the car while she was so she said 'fine' so i went back inside and they left..but came back cuz no1 wanted to go anymore. may wants to die!! if she dies then i will kill myself..it will be so scary. my mom died, i dont want the other most important person in my life to die! she doesnt even want to live for me and dana. so whats the point of me living? smoking is awful!!! i dont want her to smoke or do anything bad to herself. it just kills me inside. i swear, ive failed her...she tries her best to make me happy and i dont do shit. but i love her, more than anyone in this world! i hate that she doesnt have the money to go to culinary school, that's her @%^@*$ dream!! ok!! i wish she did. i dont want anything from her, she should just save it all/everything to go there. i cried....i hate all of this happening!! i dont wanna leave g-ville and end up not coming back! ay naku...what have i done for this to happen?!?!